Today…

Today I realized that I am a “chance” taker.

I take chances.

Mostly emotionally, but I take chances.

I wear my heart on my sleeve and I try to always see the very best in every single person I come across.

I am not sure what it is but, I believe that everyone comes into our lives for a reason.

It might not always be a good reason, but in the end…

there is always a reason.

Putting myself out there works, for me.

I do not allow my pride to hold me back…

I feel, and I express it loudly with out a care in the world.

If you hurt me, you’ll know.
If you make me happy, you’ll know.

If I am angry, you’ll know.

and sadness,

oh sadness…

it’s probably one of my most painful faces I can show.

My tears are there, and the pain pokes out my clothes.

Not only can you see my emotions, but if you are close enough…

you can feel them.

But I can say it works for me, this is how I live.

I don’t pretend, I can’t.

I’m real, I’m raw, and sometimes it’s ugly

but everyone has an ugly.

I don’t wait, at least not anymore.

I use to wait, hide, shield…

My mom would tell me… “Smile, wipe those tears and smile. Do not let others see your weakness.”

Many times she’d say “Ay Kelsey, you are too sensitive.”

As I grew I learned how to compose my emotions (Don’t worry I don’t walk around in public crying or something like that…)

I do smile, but I allow myself to feel and express myself first.

I approach the situation how I feel is correct or will work for me.

Once I’ve done that; I can finally breathe, look forward, and move on.

Therefor…

I take chances, and I am finally accepting that.

I am okay with this.

I know that sometimes I WILL get exactly what I want from taking these chances…

but,

sometimes…

Sometimes, I will get hurt.

Sometimes the outcome just won’t be what I wanted.

Sometimes I won’t get what I was hoping for.

and sometimes, or many times…

I will be disappointed. 

I am okay with this.

Because I can at least live, knowing I took the chance that my heart told me to take.

Today I realized that I am a “chance” taker.

I take chances.

But, I actually live.

If I died tomorrow, I would go in peace knowing that I actually lived

How many people can actually say that?

Some people die a long time before their hearts stop beating, I refuse to be one of them.

-Kbeautifulmind

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