When I look into my niece’s eyes…

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You wouldn’t believe the most amazing things that come from the unexpected surprises in our lives…♡

When my sister got pregnant I was mad at her.
I say some pretty mean things when I’m hurt. I mean they do say “Never believe what comes out of a persons mouth when they are mad” or “She/He was mad and didn’t mean it”
and in my case this is very true.
Usually when Im mad I laugh at people or at the situation. Ironic I know but the truth is that making me mad doesn’t happen often in my life; However hurting me can come very easy if you put effort into it well at least if I’ve grown to care about you a lot you can really destroy me emotionally.
For example, hurt me then asked me “Do you still love me?”
and you’ll probably get an “I don’t know” or I’ll make up a good one and tell you “I’ve moved on an put fire to the rain” even if I’m dying inside from all the hurt because I still love you with all my heart.

Sadly I shut down and build a wall and sadly most people haven’t stuck around long enough to break it so I just stay hurt and thats sadly the end of that…

Now piss me off, disappoint me and hurt me and even I am disturbed with what comes out of my mouth… its a very bad habit I am honestly ashamed of but I guess it’s because when I love I go all in and when I get hurt I feel so broken I just don’t know how to deal with it.

Well like I said when I found out my sister was pregnant I was hurt because she had made me a promise that ment a lot to me, I was disappointed because she betrayed that promise and I was mad because in that moment I felt like she was an idiot for allowing this to happen knowing her life wasn’t all put together like it should be. She knew how much we had suffered with our single mom so why the HELL not break the cycle and better her future…

As you can see growing up with a single mom has hurt me a lot because I don’t want my siblings to have to suffer like my mom has. I don’t want them to “work to die” I want them to “work to live” I want them to make a bright future out of themselves and become independent successful people. 
When my sister told me she was pregnant I thought her life was over…
and to some young parents it is but not because they had a baby but because they waisted it and took it for granted.
Thats when I realized that my mom didn’t “work to die” she might have worked hard all her life and didn’t get to work to “live it up” but she worked for us and she gave us a great life and loved us so much and that is living. Yeah we suffered, we stressed but then again who doesn’t.
Then on August 25th at around 1:25pm Audrina Genevieve came into our world. When I met my niece and looked into those big googly eyes I couldn’t believe it. In that moment I knew that the future of my sister wouldn’t depend on the fact that this blessing from above was now with us. It wouldn’t make a diffrence it was still on how my sister wanted to build it for herself. I realized that baby or no baby she was still going to make things happen the way she wanted to.

Yes it will be a bit harder and at times she might stress more then others but I now know Audrina is a unexpected blessing to all of us and I am so grateful for her.

Audrina has brought happiness, hope and faith in to our lives. This is something that was covered by a sad storm last December. She is our little Angel god send us to show us that everything will be alright.

When I look into my niece’s eyes I can now see that she was the best unexpected surprise anyone could have ever asked for♥

Therefor when times seem hard, and life is just dark remember that god is sending something good your way you might just not realize what it is going to come in. It can come in a new love, a good friend, or even in a addition to the family. Just know that it’s coming and it will soon brighten up your life again♥

Happy Auntie;
Kbeautifulmind

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