Set her free

image

I held her hand as her color changed.
The change in her face told me it was time to say goodbye.
A last breath as I watched her die, her body finally releasing it’s self from all of the pain.
I stroked her hair and caressed her pretty face, I couldn’t believe I was losing the driving force in my life.
I quietly whispered…
“What am I going to do with out you by my side?”
I knew her answer, but I just needed to hear it one more time.
I couldn’t face that I would never hear her voice again.
I looked at her with hope, hope that she’d open those beautiful eyes again.
I needed her to see the pain I held inside.
Maybe then, she wouldn’t leave.
Maybe she could then ask God to allow her to stay with me.
I watched those around me shed their tears, saw the look in the face of my siblings as they drowned in their sorrow and fear.
I wondered if they knew I was dying in side?
I felt like a failure, for this was the first battle her and I had actually lost.
I asked her in thoughts…
“Didn’t you say it would all be okay?”
This is not okay…
There is an agony growing in side of me, at the thought that I will no longer have my best friend here to take on life with me.
One last time I kissed her face, and gave her hand a tight squeeze.
I wanted to carry her away and keep her, yet I knew it was time to set her free.

-Kbeautifulmind

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Set her free

  1. That’s really beautiful, and sad – but very much from the heart! I’ve had the same experience myself many years ago now, and then again with my dad. Both times it strangely left me with a feeling of failure. You said it so well when you explained it was the first battle you had both lost. That’s exactly it, a new experience and a traumatic one. It takes a while for the mind to accept it all. I hope you find peace in this, eventually – it takes time, but it does come.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s