The hand he deals you…

image

“Everyone makes excuses for them.”
“They make excuses for themselves.”

“Life is just hard for them, they never get lucky with their cards.”

“God hates me”

“I was put in this world to suffer”

“Their love was tampered by life, they were delt the wrong set of cards.”

God never deals anyone the wrong set of cards, he gives you the perfect hand for your life and situation. It’s how you play the game that results if you win or lose it all.

Stop making excuses on why you couldn’t or can’t get through something.
Stop making excuses on why you’re making the hard times harder.
Stop making excuses for your bad decisions, or why you hurt someone, or why you disrespected them.
Stop making excuses on why you’re a shitty person and/or treat other’s like shit.

We are the cards in our own game, we decide how we play our hand and what results in it.
It won’t be a perfect game, there will be times where you will be down and times where you’ll be up.
You won’t always hold the higher hand in comparison to those around you, but your time will come and if you cherish what you have and play fair…

You always win.

-Kbeautifulmind

Atelphobia

She knew she feared something but couldn’t figure out what it was.
Maybe it was rejection, the idea of someone not wanting her was a bit hard to swallow for she had always been wanted by someone.
Maybe it was being alone, she had never been alone, for as long as she could remember there has always been someone there.
Maybe it was acceptance, she already knew that at times she tried too hard, she gave too much, she shared too much, she expressed too much.
She also knew that at times she was heartless, rude, careless and too honest.
So maybe, just maybe…
She feared rejection?
Maybe she feared loneliness?
or maybe…
She feared not being accepted?
But by who?
Maybe it was just atelphobia.
Atelphobia for her future, it sounded right but she still didn’t understand it.
-Kbeautifulmind

Living the dream.

I thought I was a victim

I thought I was a victim, am I not good enough I’d ask myself?
What do I have to do, to grab his full attention?
What can I do to change him, to have him see that I am what he needs?
He says I’m the one and tells the same story to all of our loved ones, but at night he rushes to his contact list to see who he can get attention from.
I thought I was a victim, so I’d despise him everytime; kicking myself thinking “maybe you are not good enough.”
You need to be smarter, learn how to drive better, don’t speak to much, don’t over think, don’t share your feelings, don’t bother him to the extremes.
I thought I was a victim because he made me feel that way, then I realized I played apart in my own unhappiness by deciding to stay.
-Kbeautifulmind

Why must I hide

Why must I hide what I have been through, just to protect your image for those who care about you.
Why can’t I share with the world what I’m feeling inside, without a care in the world of what you’ll look like.
Why are they offended by what I have said, if I speak the truth of what has happened.
When did I become the bad guy after all of this?
Can’t they see how much I loved you and how deep is my agony?
Why can’t they understand me as humans?
Can’t they see how broken I am and what you’ve done is unfair?
You do this with out feeling any guilt, make them fall madly in love, using them for your needs till you get bored and move on.
Tell them the truth, since you claim to be such a good man, tell them all the hurt you caused me before the very end.
Tell them how I covered it and was force to put on a smile like there was no pain.
Tell them what I wrote was what you deserved and no less.
Why must I hide to protect your image?
Why can’t you tell them exactly what happened.

-kbeautifulmind

Stand by your people…

image

Stand by your people and we will succeed.
Know that all of our hearts move to the same beat.
Stop with the names, the descriptions, and the identity tags.
Know that we all are made of the same atoms and body fats.
Stand by your people and we will succeed.
Don’t let those in power take over and defeat our communities.
Don’t let them divide us and make us fight, as they watch in laughter and enjoy the motion picture they’ve created with us.
Stand by your people and we will succeed.
Remember we all come from the same theory of our origins, one’s we can not escape no matter how hard we try to deny.
We are all made of the same formulas and no matter our skin color, sex, or ethnicity we are one.
Stand by your people and we will succeed.
Because we are all woman, men, daughters, sons, fathers, mothers and beautiful souls of the human race.
People who can unite and shatter their greed, as we destroy the xenophobia and racism we continue to practice in today’s society.
Stand by your people and we will succeed.
For we should all be reminded that we are all African, Hispanic, Asian, Middle Eastern, Caucasian and deserve the same rights.
Stand by your people and realize that catagorizing each other is the only obsticle stopping us from success and defeat.

In honor of Black History Month and in Celebration of all the beautiful people of our society,
-Kbeautifulmind

I want myself back.

I don’t want you back.

I want myself back.

I want the care free gal that was inspired by love.

I want the woman with dreams, that believed in true love.

I don’t want you back.

I want myself back.

I want the gal who laughed loudly.

The gal who sung freely, and lived wisely.

I don’t want you back.

I want myself back.

I miss the old me.

The same one who managed to see good in you,

and trusted so openly.

I don’t want you back.

I want myself back.

-Kbeautifulmind

I won’t stop until I’m her…

image
I wake up and see her, she’s so close, yet so far it’s frustrating.
She knows what she wants, even if at times it seems like she’ll never achieve it.
She tries hard to fulfill it, but her disatisfaction is so loud it’s resounding.
One problem, two problems, three problems, four , when will she be happy with what she’s got?
I’ve become obsessed with the woman I am suppose to be.
The woman I believe, she needs to be.
I wake up and see her, she’s so close, yet so far it’s obstruct.
She’s the reason behind everything I do, she’s the reason I’ve yet to give up.
My actions are carefully conducted, with that familiar face in mind.
I won’t stop until I’m her.
-Kbeautifulmind

Our memories…

image

Our memories still float in the night sky, like the stars above shinning bright.
All the promises we made, all the sweet things we said, run and scream loud through these old times.
In pictures we’re still happy, in our love letters we’re still forever.
Our memories still float in the night sky,
like the stars that shined bright on that night at the stop light.
The time where the light paused on red, uniting our souls and our love as we made love till the end.
With fire and desire in our eyes we burned our names on the pavement, building up with lust as we steamed up the glass in the car.
Your kisses seemed true, as we united our bodies together and moved them to the beat of the music on the stereo.
Our memories still float in the night sky, like the stars that shined bright on that night, when I carved forever on your back with my nails hoping nothing would tear us apart.
-Kbeautifulmind

Some kind of lie…

Now in days everyone is living in some kind of lie.
We are afraid of showing other’s who we are in side.
Some of us don’t even know who we are, as we find ourselves always confused in our disguise.
Take off your mask and I’ll take off mine. And maybe, just maybe I can see what you really define.
You can see what I have to offer and truly see me naked under all this skin.
I want to read your mind,
and see what’s underneath.
I want to feel your flesh and see you from within.
Away from society,
no judgment,
No mask,
just you and I.
Just two vulnerable souls, telling each other our sins and sharing our thoughts.
Take off your mask and I’ll take off mine.
Let’s not be like them and keep living in some kind of lie.

-Kbeautifulmind

Destroyed her heart…

image

She did it every night.
That’s all she ever knew.
She took pride in what she did, even if it made her feel empty and blue.
Boys, guys, men they were all the same. None of them worth anything to her, at least that’s what she claimed.
She never met her daddy, or ever knew the loving of a man so she saw them all as toys and categorized them all the same.
The rest of us were jealous as we saw her so care free, we wondered how she did it, how did she not feel guilty?
We didn’t wish to be like her, we thought she was dirty.
We just wanted the same un attachment and the power to guard our hearts and be worry free.
Unfortunately no one knew her and what she really felt.
She was ashamed of what she was but couldn’t find another route.
All she dreamed of was true love, but didn’t know how to stop, as her sexual desire took over and once again destroyed her heart.

-Kbeautifulmind