1,2,3,4… 30

Thump…

That’s all she heard, she raised her sleepy head, and suddenly a rush of blood flew quick through her veins and her entire body.

She can hear his name being called through his phone, “_______, are you okay?”

Call the police she yelled to the receiver hoping she’d hear, “Call the police!”

“What did you take?” she screamed, “what did you take?”

He couldn’t understand her. Not anymore than she could understand him.

She screamed, as she dropped the phone. The conversation she was having hung from her thigh with the voice of another “friend,” that, had she listened, was telling her what was wrong with him.

“Oh god, what the fuck did you take! Oh god, oh god, oh god!”

“Help! Somebody help me!” Her voice cracked, as she screamed to the top of her lungs.”

“My brother, my brother, something is wrong with my brother…” she said into the receiver of her phone.

She hung up the phone, and then dialed 9-1-1

Time didn’t stop, but, it moved very slow.

She could see the room spinning…

“Get yourself together K, you have to save him!” she yelled mentally.

She could barely make up her words, she tried to tell the dispatcher something serious was wrong…

The dispatcher had heard her, “I know mam, we just received a call, police is on the way, can you confirm the address…”

“east… yeah east”

“Mam, we need you to calm down please, he is most likely having a seizure.”

“He isn’t breathing! He isn’t breathing! He is purple! His lips, his face, he’s purple!”

She drops the phone…

“CPR! I know CPR, Iv’e known CPR since I was 15…”

“What is the count? What is the fucken count!?”

“Oh god, Oh god, Moooooommmmm pllllleeassseeee!”

push 1, push 2, push 3, push 4, push 5, push 6, push 7, push 8, push 9, push 10, push 11, push 12, push 13, push 14, push 15…

Tilt, Blow. Blow.

“No! It’s fucken 30!” she yelled, mentally.

“What the fuck did you take? Moooommmmm!”

Push 1, push 2, push 3, push 4, push 5, push 6, push 7, push 8, push 9, push 10, push 11…

tears running down her face, she can not believe this is happening…

“Why would this happen?,” she thought.

“No way is he going like this…” she mumbled mentally.

“Mom, I freaken need you, pleaseee!”

Push 12, push 13, push 14, push 15, push 16, push 17, push 18, push 19, push 20, push 21, push 22, push 23, push 24, push 25, push 26, push 27, push 28, push 29, push 30

Tilt, BLOW and… BLOW.

GASP, he rises and tries to lean forward.

Siiggghhhh, “Thank you mom,” she whispered as her tears fell into her mouth.

“No, no, no don’t move please, don’t move…” she told him…

She ran out and yelled, “Help! Someone one please help me!”

Flash lights coming through, police walked up, walked in, and took over.

She was cold, and at the same time sweaty.

She was scared, and at the same time proud.

She was worried.

“Can you hug me?,” she asked as she stood outside with someone.

“Can you please just hug me very tight?”

Heart beating fast, breathing oh, so, difficult.

Anxiety expanding and spreading through her body.

Body felt like collapsing…

Officer, “Are you the mother? Can I speak to you? What happen?”

1,2,3,4,5 … breathe.

-Kbeautfiulmind

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Antepasados/Ancestors

Yo soy la lumbre que alumbra el camino,

Yo camino los pasos de los que vinieron antes de mí.

Yo cuento sus historias, sus de deseos, y mantengo sus sueños vivos.

Yo represento el sufrimiento, y el dolor.

Estoy hecha de la misma sangre que coreo en sus venas.

La lucha no solo es mía,

Es de mis antepasados.

De mis abuelos.

De mis padres.

Y para aquellos que vendrán después de mí.

-Kbeautifulmind

I am the flame that illuminates the pathway.

I walk in the footsteps of those that came before me.

I tell their old stories, their desires, and maintain their dreams alive.

I represent the sacrifice, and the pain.

I’m made of the same blood that ran through their veins.

This fight isn’t only my fight.

It’s of my ancestors.

It’s of my grandparents.

It’s of my parents.

… and for those that’ll come after me.

-Kbeautifulmind

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Hello Dear WordPress Followers,

I’d to take this moment to thank you all for reading my work, for being fans of what I write and believe in since I created my blog.

I’d also like to address that I’m working on writing more this year, expanding my words to touch more lives, and to share that I have some new and fun exciting project ideas on the way!

I’ve decided to create a “Professional Instagram” page, were I’d like to expose my poetry, quotes, short stories, advise through my knowledge, and display my soon to come videos or audio recordings!

I hope you all will follow and join me in this exciting journey!

Instagram: Kbeautifulmind__ (those are two _ _ )

Thanks y’all! I’m excited!

XO,

Kbeautifulmind

I will not 

I will not allow anyone or anything make me feel sorry for the way I love. I love hard. 

I love sincerely. 

I love with all my heart. 

I love this way because I have lost. 

I love this way because I know we are not all here forever. 

I love this way because I am grateful. 

I will now allow anyone or anything make me feel sorry for the way I love. 

Because If I intimidate the relationships of others for the way I love myself, my friends, and family… 

Then it’s is completely obvious that I am not the one with a problem. 

-Kbeautifulmind 

Pep Talks 

Never feel sorry for being you. Even if your way of being intimidates others as long as you mean no harm and you are being the real you, then you’ve done nothing wrong.

Never apologize for being honest, true, appreciative, or loving. 

There is not that many people in this world with pure and kind hearts anymore. 

There is nothing to be ashamed of. 

Don’t change or filter your true self. 

No matter who you lose along the way, as long as your conscious is clear and your heart is pure… 

You won’t be the one losing. 

-Kbeautifulmind  

She finally realized that it was time to grow. 

It was time to stop apologizing for the wrongs of others. 

It was time to stop apologizing for expressing her feelings. 

It was time to stop trying too hard to keep something or someone that didn’t want to be kept. 

It was time to stop trying so hard to keep everyone else around her happy and satisfied.

It was time to look out for herself. 

To understand that others are not hear to please her and take care of her needs. 

To understand that nothing is forever, and just like the good times…

the bad times will also pass. 

If she wants to be happy, it is her responsibility.

-Kbeautifulmind 

This time next year.

image

“God is within her, she will not f a l l.”

image

Last night I had a selfie session.
As I thought about how screwed up my life was this time last year…
I smiled, because I am so proud of myself and how much I have over came as a person.
How much I have grown, and how positive I kept my mind and spirit.
Then I thought about how much I still need to over come…
Something in my gut just tells me that all the worries I hold in my heart now, won’t be anything by this time next year.
Stay positive people!
Kbeautifulmind