Stop aging, and start growing.

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Ever wonder why some people are less mature than other people of the same age?
Now, there is nothing wrong with a woman/man that can be a kid at heart at the right time.

I personally will forever enjoy sitting on a swing at the park, or filling up some water balloons in the summer and having an epic water balloon fight.

Anyway, I’m talking about those people that even though they have aged by the years, they continue to react with ignorance to different life situations.
I mean, I’ll admit I am guilty of stooping down to the level of some of these people sometimes…
(I’m sure we all do it)

However, in my defense I usually don’t start anything.
For the most part, I try my very best to stir away from immature people.

Anyway…

I’m
talking about those who have aged but, still have not grown to take responsibility for their own actions or mistakes.

I don’t know about you guys, but every time I encounter people like this I ask myself… “Why?”

I learned the other day, that these people may have a birthday every year but some of them do not necessarily allow them selves to grow from the year they got to live.
They don’t allow themselves to learn from their mistakes, nor to take the life lessons they have received and grow from them.
Instead, some of these people continue to allow themselves to play victims, to act like it’s everyone else’s fault why things happen to them, and to make themselves believe that if they ignore the issues they have encountered or the issues they have with themselves… it will all just “poof” and dissappear.

If you are one of these people, sorry pal, it doesn’t work that way!

Not only do they do this but some of them also allow their experiences to become so profound and they still won’t address them.
Instead they store them in and lock them up.
Only later realizing how much this way of living has hurt them and stopped them from growing as a person.

So I say…
“Stop aging, and start growing!”

As you evolve over the years as a person, you must confront your issues with personal growth. If not, you are aging but you are not growing. This is the only way to actually be able to live and have the opportunity to really look back and say…

“Wow, look at how far I’ve came, look at how much I’ve changed, look at how much I’ve GROWN.”

My mom always said…
“If one person says it, they are just being nasty. But if multiple people say it, over, and over, even the ones you know truly love you… then you might have some self observing to do.”

So with that said, pay close attention to yourself and who you reflect as a person. 
Don’t go changing yourself just because one person told you there is something wrong.
Take in the criticism and see what it means, if changing would better you as a person, and if it’s coming from a person that matters and who’s intentions are good.
It’s learning to see yourself through the eyes of others who matter, to better understand yourself and truly grow.

-Kbeautifulmind

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Your Flower

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Just because someone chose to give their heart to you, does not mean the love is set in stone.
Just like a flower needs soil, water, and attentive care to flourish; This person needs your effort, hands, mind, a connection, and attention to detail in order to continue to feel the same.

Take care of your flower, don’t let their love for you wither…
making them look to flourish in the heart of someone else.
-Kbeautifulmind

F-a-t-h-e-r

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Last night…

I had the most interesting dream.

In it, I was six years old…

in a national spelling bee.

Feeling like a genius as I spelled complex words….

duodenum….

serendipity…..

floccinaucinihilipilification….

up until the final round

one word between me and victory

the spell master clears his throat

young lady your word is father

the crowd began to chatter amongst themselves

seemingly displeased

at the simplicity of this final word

I searched for those eyes

those eyes that say

“every things going to be ok, just do it”

And there she was, as beautiful as always…

I dazed off

young lady!

your word is father

I stood up straight, looked at her and began

father, m-o-t-h-e-r, father…

the spell master looks at me,

down at his flash card,

back up at me,

“sorry but you are incorrect”

I don’t understand…

My father is sitting right in the audience

“excuse me?”

“I am sorry young lady but you are incorrect”

well then,

you can save your sorry apologies

because you must mean “in-correct”

as in within the parameters of being right.

let me explain something to you

cuz obviously you did not grow up

where “father’s” are donors

just a human being who donates the soil to make the seed grow

and when he’s gone

all he’s left us

was alone

where minstrel men stroll around off sight

while fathers balanced their menstrual,

3 jobs,

4 kids

and a life

on a unicycle

and it looks something like this:

breastfeeding on one arm

phone on the shoulder

cooking with the other arm

cleaning with one leg

tying sneakers with their teeth

young fathers

who make mistakes to think that love lived in their place, before he left

But we are not all perfect and they learned to live

And the one mistake they never make

is abandoning their seeds

you see fathers

are master gardeners

they tend to every leaf

removing the weeds

placing us in the windows of opportunity

so that we can lean towards the sun

and never forget that the sky is the limit

planting kisses on our cheeks

hugs on our backs

growing their love on us

the best way they know how

like my father

my father, sacrificed owning nothing,

so that I may have everything

my father, walked a daily nightmare

so that I may live out my dreams

my father watered me

with blood sweat and tears

so that I may be ripe

for the harvest

and I hope that one day

I can grow up to be as great a father

as she was for me

you did not ask me to spell deadbeat sir…

but if you want dead beat here it is:

f-a-t-h-e-r,
d-a-d,
d-a-d-d-y,
p-o-p,
p-o-p-s,
if you want the slang

And if you want an actual name…

F-r-a-n-k

you asked me to spell father

and father is, and always has been,

and always will be spelled…

m-o-t-h-e-r

so get your encyclopedias,

show me your flash cards

open your dictionary

cuz what webster says

means nothing around here

around here,

my father is sitting right there…

and I love her.

Because with out my father, with out her, I wouldn’t be standing here in front of you today.

Happy Father’s Day to my wonderful, wonder woman who is now in Heaven watching over me♡

I love you momma 🙂

Kbeautifulmind

-This entire poem did not originate with me, it is a remake of a poem I once heard.
Thank you for reading…

What if I fell into a coma…

Today I sit here tired and bored getting paid to do nothing.
I should be taking this time to start working on my term paper but my brain is filled with so many other thoughts.
Life can be such a handful, I begin to think about all that has gone wrong in my life and all that has gone right.
I have fallen as many times as I have been lifted up yet the falling always seems to hurt more.
Today the scars outweight my heart and I begin to wonder or imagine this story of what would happen if I fell into a coma.
I wouldn’t want to check out for a long time maybe 3 months max, into a deep sleep where my body, mind and soul just gets to rest and rebut it’s self so that it comes back with a stronger grip on life.
There is so many questions I’d want answered when I woke up.
What did I miss?
Who still lives?
Who was born?
Who was worried about me?
And who stood by my side for all 3 months?
I also began to wonder what If I woke up and remebered nothing?
Would I be okay starting over with a blank slate?  Or would I miss some of it?
Who would I remember? What would I forget?

I almost drove myself crazy thinking about this. I mean seriously it would be a big deal to be able to check out like that with the possibility that you might wake up knowing no one or remembering nothing!?

In a way it would be nice, even though my past makes me the better person I am today, If some of these memories could be erased I would no longer have to feel some of the pain and hurt that haunts me on random days.

Then I relized that even though there is more things I would like to forget then those I want to remember; If I actually forgot a lot of these things I’d probably feel empty.
I began to realize that its the memories in my life that make me who I am and have kept me going.

However I have to admit it be nice to at least have the option…

Maybe, just maybe if it could be as easy as grabbing it all like a group of documents or pictures you no longer want or need and putting them in a fire pit, watching them burn slowly and once they were done burning they’d be gone forever. If they could be gone but still leave me with the good lessons and not take away my new persona with them would I take it? Would I be willing to let go of everything in order to no longer hurt until of course getting hurt again?

Its a very interesting thought…. isn’t it?
What would you do?

I might take burning it all over the coma… If only.

Kbeautifulmind.