Tag: pain

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I’ve always lived a pretty hard life.
Finacially things have never been at their best, and over all god has truly picked on me to carry-on a B I G load of stress.
So yes I’m the person that constantly thinks…
“MY life would be so much easier if I had more money.”

“MONEY could really get rid of all this stress right now?”

“Do you know how happy I’d be if I had a lot of money?”

And to tell you all the truth.
Money really truly could fix A L O T of my problems right now…

But money could never give me happiness.

That is something I have needed to find on my own, with in myself, with in my struggles, and the life god has gave me.

Money doesn’t buy happiness.
Fame doesn’t make you any less human.
It might make “society” a little easier.
It might make the standards we have to live up to a little less stressful.
But LIFE in it’s self, to truly L I V E has nothing to do with “everything” you have.
You can only enjoy life and survive life with soul food, inner peace, self love, comfort, and support from the rest of the humans in your life and the love of all humanity in it’s self.
Today, tomorrow and always we should smile at people… a simple hello, I love you, or asking how their day is going can save their life.
A simple ear to listen can make them keep pushing.
A simple hug can remind them that they are not alone.
Live like you are dying and love like you are dying because you never know what kind of demons others are fighting on the inside.
You never know what kind of emotional or physical sicknesses those around you are struggling to fight.
Over use I love you and count your blessing!
Remember, life is a gift and health is a privilege. †
-Kbeautifulmind

I want to thank you

I want to thank you.

I want to thank you for all the simple things.

The laughs, the comfort, the peace.

I want to thank you.

I want to thank you because with you I felt myself again.

With you I learned to smile again, to really laugh, to relax, and really breathe.

You see before you life and people destroyed me.

These things that happened to me stripped me, they demolished who I was, what I believed in…

and you, this stranger came into my life and helped me in so many ways that you have no idea of.

I want to thank you, because a part of my healing, self love, and happiness is all thanks to you.

-Kbeautifulmind

You must live fully and love with all your heart, despite how hard it may be at times.
That’s how you live, that’s how you look back at an old age or the moment before death and realized you lived.
People who are inspired, who push them selves to really feel, to really feel, because they want to be a part of something larger…
those are the ones who live, who really live.
-Kbeautifulmind

Where was I when you figured out all those little doubts were just too much to conquer,

Was I smilin’ like a fool
Over morning kisses and pancakes?

Did you know it was a lie
When you said you could see yourself with me?

Was I laying on your chest rocking my hips to your heart beat?

Was it after making love, as you noticed I was falling?

Was there ever an exact moment, or did your feelings never rise for me?

What was it like to watch me fall, knowing that you wouldn’t catch me?

Where was I?
Why couldn’t I see it ending?

-Kbeautifulmind

Consumed

No one understands what it’s like to let yourself be consumed by a relationship because you love them, until you have experienced it.
Remember, yes you may love them (boyfriend/girlfriend/friends/AND specially FAMILY) but don’t ever lose yourself over love.
If it is unhealthy, if they don’t care like you do, if they don’t appreciate you, respect you, and love you like you deserve… it’s time to throw in the towel and call it quits.
I know it’s hard, we were taught to never be quitters, BUT sometimes it’s your life over their needs.
And staying somewhere, where you are miserable, unhealthy, abusing substances (yes food is a substance), is just you slowly committing succide over the the happiness of others.
It just ISN’T worth it.
-Kbeautifulmind

I want you

I don’t need you, and that’s what makes you special.
I want you, and wanting you like this feels so much better than needing you or anyone, as a matter of fact.
I want you, me wanting you is pure, it’s actual, it’s honest, it’s real.
I’ve never wanted anyone in my life, but somehow you have come along and I want you.
I want to continue to feel the emotions you bring me upon.
I want to continue to see your smile on mornings when we can sleep in.
Only to be followed by morning love making and yummy breakfast to finish.
I want to continue to laugh so naturally like only you have made me do.
I want to bicker about the little things we bicker about on purpose to mess with the other.
I want to continue to get to know you, and I want to see where it all goes.
I don’t need you, I want you.

-Kbeautifulmind

You robbed me.

You robbed me.

Days, months, a year and more later, I can finally speak of it.

You robbed me.

You robbed me for my beauty, my innocence, my strenght, my confidence, for everything I believed in, you saw my vulnerability and you stripped me for everything I was.

You were so insecure and unhappy with yourself, and I was your victim.

From the minute we got involved romantically, you played me.

You played me, you’d lie and lie to me, and you’d blame and blame me.

You brought me down to my knees, to tears, to insecurity, to pain…
pain that made me believe it was all my fault.
Pain that made me believe I deserved it, pain that made me believe there was something wrong with ME.

You never hit me, you never abused me, but your cheating was just as bad or even worse.

You were a good friend before our involvement, but you were the worse “lover” anyone could ever ask for…
and I cant believe that through out all those years I never saw it.

You knew I was nice, you knew I was selfless, honorable, loyal, respectful, but most of all you knew I was passionate.

You knew I wouldn’t give up on you, you knew I’d fight for you, you knew I’d forgive you… over and over again…

So you robbed me, you be littled me, you took advantage of me, you took me for granted.

You destroyed me.

You took advantage of my passion and fight and you weakened me.

You robbed me, you robbed me for all I was…

and days, months, a year and more later I can finally talk about it…

Because I have gratefully found myself again.

-Kbeautifulmind