I will not 

I will not allow anyone or anything make me feel sorry for the way I love. I love hard. 

I love sincerely. 

I love with all my heart. 

I love this way because I have lost. 

I love this way because I know we are not all here forever. 

I love this way because I am grateful. 

I will now allow anyone or anything make me feel sorry for the way I love. 

Because If I intimidate the relationships of others for the way I love myself, my friends, and family… 

Then it’s is completely obvious that I am not the one with a problem. 

-Kbeautifulmind 

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There is nothing more painful than silence.

Not knowing if the other person misses you…

Wondering if they want to talk to you as much as you want to talk to them…

Thinking of how much you wish you could share something with them…

Reflecting on all the things you’d share, say, and do…

There is nothing more painful than silence, you find yourself wishing that phone would ring again.

-Kbeautifulmind

Easter Morning…

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Easter morning and I wake up with chills, as I lay on the bed wishing you were here.
Easter has always been the holiday that brought you so much joy, because you loved the atmosphere there was in the world.
You always shared with me your thoughts and said…
“Today just seems to bring unity in families and you can’t help but feel blessed.”
Last year Easter was just so cold and blue, as it fell on the Sunday of April 20th only two days before twenthy two.
As you laid there on your death bed with the hospice nurse by your side, she told us to celebrate today like everything was fine.
But how could we enjoy the holiday you loved so much, if you were in pain no longer able to look at us or say much.
I remember just holding you as I tried not to cry, my body so tired with no sleep or food to give it life.
Easter Sunday last year was a day of unity and love, but filled with so much pain as we waited for god to take you in his arms.
I didn’t feel peace, nor did I feel blessed, as you’ve always made me feel in the past because I was losing my bestfriend.
Yet here I am almost a year later on Easter morning, laying in bed, listening to your favorite songs, and in between all the tears and the pain I some how feel blessed.
I guess it’s because, I can still feel your presence.

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-Kbeautifulmind

I miss you mommy.

The sacrifice

I wish they’d understand the sacrifice, a sacrifice she made for someone she loved.
She took on a responsibility she never desired, as a matter of fact she was so careful in her own personal decisions just to never be in her shoes.
The struggles of her hero were the birth control she used in order to never fall in the same hole.
I wish they’d understand the sacrifice, a sacrifice she made for someone she loved.
She took on the responsibility that no one else wanted, if they only knew how many people told her no.
She had no choice but to leave them to her, she had no choice but to put her kids in her hands.
They both knew this would be hard, they both knew she’d lose and be the one to come in last.
But she asked her…
And she accepted.
She made a promise and as hard as it may get, she won’t break it.
I just wish they’d understand the sacrifice, a sacrifice she made for someone she loves.

-Kbeautifulmind