Tag: Life

Milestone

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Every year is a milestone, around this time last year I was so unhappy with my life and my self.
I couldn’t understand why life took the turns it did, and why I no longer had my best friend by my side. I believed in people who didn’t believe in me, and I got comfortable with discomfort. I lost myself on my road to happiness, and followed the path of destroying myself, for the chance of pleasing others.
I’ve always been a “planner,” almost never missing a deadline of what I set myself out to do. Therefor disappointment is something I don’t take very lightly and when things don’t work out my way, I always end up very mad at myself.

However, every year is a milestone…
and this year has taught me so, so much, I am forever grateful.
Thanks to the past, I am off my fairytale horse and I’ve never felt more satasfied, alive, and happy🌻

Like a Butterfly

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You tuck me in, turn out the lights,
kept me safe and sound at night,
little girls depend on things like that.
You taught me how to dress myself, and almost always combed my hair, helped build my self-esteem and helped me build a heart that cares.
You had to deal with my funny moods, but calmed me down before I turned blue, reminding me that I would be alright.
You were always there when I looked back, the two of us made quite a team, never did I think we’d ever be separated quite so fast.
You had to do it all alone, a single mom who had to make a living and make a home.
It must have been as hard as it could be, but even through all the struggles and hard times, you kept a smile on your face not letting us see how much of you life would take.
And when I couldn’t sleep at night, scared things wouldn’t turn out right
you would hold my hand and simply tell me…
“Just like caterpillar in the trees, how you wonder who you’ll be, but with time you will see.
Don’t you worry, hold on tight.
I promise you there will come a time, where like a butterfly you will also spread your wings.”
-Kbeautifulmind

Nothing in life should be that hard.
However it also shouldn’t be too easy, it should take work, and effort.
However, it shouldn’t stress you or worry you to the point of insanity.
If it’s worth it or good for you it should have a natural balance.
If it doesn’t…
Get rid of it.
Simple.
-Kbeautifulmind

Favorite Garden

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Today I took a walk in our favorite garden.
First time we discovered this place was as a family.
Second time I came here you asked me to bring you.
We grabbed lunch and spent the evening here just talking, and I almost chocked on my food.
You said, “Dios mio, you can’t die, then I die, then the kids would really be screwed!”
I laughed so hard my rice came out my nose.
I came here today because you been on my mind a lot, I miss you.
Everything is way harder than I thought, and I don’t even know if I’m doing it right?
I have accepted that you’re gone but sometimes I just want to feel you, to know you’re there, one more talk?
and nothing….
It gets very frustrating…
I wish you’d knock something over in the room, or make the lights flicker, something…?
I know wearing your ashes around my neck gives me a piece of mind, but sometimes I just want to feel you, and when I get nothing I begin to feel hopeless as I see no reassurance that you are there.
As I walked today, remembering you laugh, your funny jokes, and how annoyed you’d get when I kiss or hugged you “too much,” I ran into this heart, not sure who took their time to make it, but I think this was the sign I needed.
Glad to know you are still here♡
-Kbeautifulmind

If you’re sharing it, you ain’t winning.

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Unfortunetly in today’s time, we are all to blame for the way people hurt each other and compete for something or someone that isn’t even worth the fight.
Today relationships are losing their meaning because no one is committing anymore, and “couples” are now stuck in “situationships” for months on end…
Why?
Well…
No one appreciates what’s in front of them, people have no self respect anymore, or respect for others.
Everyone is trying to keep their options open, yet treat all their options like they are the only one.
There is men/women who lead on other women/men, into making them believing that they care, into making them feel special and manipulating them into falling for the potential they are, yet not letting them know if they will ever actually be something more.
Yet the way they treat you, tell you they care, hold you, kiss you, and sexually please you, you can’t help but fall.
So what happens when you fall?
Well you become competitive, you get jealous, you want to be respected as the only one like you are being treated, and now the fight starts with “the other women/men.”
However, the one person who started it all, sits back and can’t seem to understand what the problem is…
What the problem here is that people date now in days with out committing.
They date multiple people, to see what they want, yet they hurt people as they go.
People have become so selfish, and the victims have become options.

You’re texting one girl and putting heart emojis on her pictures and making endless love with the other while cuddling and kissing her on her four head on your bed.
You plan weekend get aways with one, as you tell the other one you will be coming to visit soon.
You tell one you really care about her, and ask her questions about a future, and who knows what you are telling the other.
So what’s in it for the competitors?
Nothing.
Chances are he is eating one girl and kissing the other.
Chances are she is treating one like a king and using the same ideas on the other guy.
So what do you do if you are stuck as the competitor?
You don’t compete!
Plain and simple!!!
You can either accept that you have become an option for the future and take your chance to win them over and just have your fun OR you let them go and find someone that will appreciate you and give you the commitment that you want.
Commitment or not, love is a battle field but a battle to win over not to litterly fight others for it.
Fghting, talking shit to and about the other is not going to get you anything.
Besides making you look like a total idiot.
Bragging how you’ve had him for over months on end only makes you look stupid if you never got the commitment.
Remember, love yourself first, know your worth and place, and trust your heart abd what you bring to the table. If they stick around and appreciate it good, but never compete for them.
Remember as long as you are sharing you are definetly not winning.

-Kbeautifulmind