Easter morning and I wake up with chills, as I lay on the bed wishing you were here.
Easter has always been the holiday that brought you so much joy, because you loved the atmosphere there was in the world.
You always shared with me your thoughts and said…
“Today just seems to bring unity in families and you can’t help but feel blessed.”
Last year Easter was just so cold and blue, as it fell on the Sunday of April 20th only two days before twenthy two.
As you laid there on your death bed with the hospice nurse by your side, she told us to celebrate today like everything was fine.
But how could we enjoy the holiday you loved so much, if you were in pain no longer able to look at us or say much.
I remember just holding you as I tried not to cry, my body so tired with no sleep or food to give it life.
Easter Sunday last year was a day of unity and love, but filled with so much pain as we waited for god to take you in his arms.
I didn’t feel peace, nor did I feel blessed, as you’ve always made me feel in the past because I was losing my bestfriend.
Yet here I am almost a year later on Easter morning, laying in bed, listening to your favorite songs, and in between all the tears and the pain I some how feel blessed.
I guess it’s because, I can still feel your presence.
I miss you mommy.
A couple of weeks ago I got in a small accident with some idiot and well long story short I currently don’t have a car.
I seriously wonder sometimes if I am going to die in some sort of car accident or car situation because I always have some sort of issue. Last year alone I had 5 flat tires; can you say, bad luck? -_-
Anyway so the point of sharing that is that since I don’t have a car I’m driving my mom’s car to work and school and what not. You don’t realize how much your car means to you till you don’t have it, sharing a car with my mom is a bit stressful.
Yesterday I went to work and my mom called me around 5 to see if I was going to make it to mass. I couldn’t make it do to work and I figured she wouldn’t go because she can’t really walk.
I was wrong…
On my way home from work she called me to pick her and the boys up at church, I was so shocked wondering who had taken her or how they got there?
She took a taxi! Ha ha
I told her “Mom! A taxi? Why didn’t you just skip today, you can’t even walk!”
And she said to me…
“God doesn’t skip blessing me, or waking me up for another day, or making sure my kids and loved ones are safe… Therefor if I have to crawl to church one day out of the week for the rest of my life then I will!”
I was surprised by her answer and at the same time ashamed of myself for not thinking the same way.
It made me realize that like always she was right! God has been so good to us since she got diagnosed, and even when it seems like the road is ending he opens up another path for us.
Please take a minute to share my link:
As I try to raise money for my mom’s treatment!